Protect Your Memories from Technology Failure

Why am I so passionate about memories? I want to be in control of my memories and not lose them as technology changes, as devices break or get lost or even natural disasters. I want to help people ensure their memories are protected.

The first thing we need to do to preserve our memories is to understand the technology and where our photos are. We need to ensure that our phones, our computers and SD cards are backed up and how that works. I will cover this in more detail in a later post.

My husband and I have had multiple drives fail and it's scary. The first time, our MacBook was getting the blue screen of death. It would work for 10-15 minutes at a time but then would shut down. During the times when it worked, I was frantically copying files and photos to an external hard drive in order to preserve them. I managed to save most of the files that were meaningful, but lost a few. It hurts and is frustrating to lose files.

We then started to do time machine backups on our computers. When our iMac drive failed, we managed to preserve almost everything by recovering files from the Time Machine backup. A computer failing is like a fire destroying photo albums. I wrote in my last post that since I was a child, I knew that if I had time, in case of fire, I would grab the photo albums. It was a fear I often thought about.

It's been a learning process over the years, as one machine breaks, of learning how it worked and staying up to date with technology. A lot of times I didn't understand and when it failed, that's when I learned what I didn't understand.

Last year, I was preparing a presentation for a moms group about preserving memories and I wasn't sure whether I wanted to talk about technology. Everyone doesn't have the same technology and I'm not a technology expert. I have lost memories when technology failed me and I didn't fully understand how it worked. That's how I learned, but I didn't want to learn everyone's technology so I didn't want to bring it up. 

But as I was writing my presentation on my MacBook where all my photos were stored, my MacBook broke, two weeks before my presentation. So I thought, the universe wants me to talk about technology. I can't resist bringing it up. I asked the moms, if your computer failed or you lost your phone, would you be okay? Would your memories be preserved? Many moms' eyes opened wide with fear. I may not be able to teach someone how to preserve or recover their memories, but I hope to inspire them to learn or hire someone to help them.

When it happened to me that time, I was bummed to spend a lot of money on a new computer and because I was in a rush for the replacement, I didn't get the ideal computer for me, I bought something in stock. It was a calm process because this time, I also had a cloud backup. I recently realized that perhaps I didn't save everything once again, because again, I didn't fully understand how icloud worked. But that's a conversation for another day.

The first thing is understanding the technology we're using with our computers, phones and cameras and that is also for our old video cameras and cassettes we used to use and quality settings when we're digitizing. I'll be covering more of these topics in future posts.  The first step is understanding where our memories are so we can preserve our collection as a whole.

Preserving Memories in a Digital World

[Note: I'm transcribing the videos from my YouTube Channel and back dating them to when I posted the videos for those who prefer reading. If you prefer watching, visit my YouTube channel at www.youtube.com/@suzannesewell]

I launched my YouTube channel in order to inspire people to preserve their memories and revive their most meaningful ones. The reason I want to do that is because I want to preserve my memories and revive the most meaningful ones myself. By inspiring others, by sharing ideas, I can also be preserving my memories and reviving what matters the most to me.

This has been something that has been close to my heart my whole life. Since I can remember, I have always known that if there was a fire in our house and everyone was safe, I knew where the photo albums were and I would try to grab them if there was time.

I'm not sure where this started. I don't know if there was a firefighter that came to our school and asked what we would grab in a fire, but it's something I always knew. No matter where I lived even after I moved away from home, I would know where my albums were so I could grab them in case of fire, or in case of evacuation. That was really important to me.

When we started a family, I started scrapbooking and my album collection really started to grow. I ended up with dozens of photo albums, especially after I was also teaching classes and hosting workshops where we would work on our albums together. As my collection grew, I realized that my escape plan didn't really work anymore. I couldn't grab all those albums in case of a fire. If I was given 24 hours to evacuate, perhaps, but in a spur of a moment, those albums would not be saved.

As a backup I used to keep negatives somewhere else, so if something happened to the albums, at least we had negatives to reprint the photos. This all changed when digital photography emerged.

I stopped scrapbooking around 2008 because I became overhwlemed. We had a digital camera for 3 years and as time passed, I felt even more overwhelmed and kept procrastinating. It got worse when we got cellular phones carrying a camera with us all the time. The number of photos we take now in one year is approximately what we used to take in 10 years. Globally we take 1.4 trillion photos every year. This is equivalent to100-200 photos a year on average per person in 2000; and 1200-1500 per year per person in 2020. (My average is much higher, how about you?)

What do we do with them all? Ten years after I stopped scrapbooking, I really felt the weight of the clutter on my shoulders, especially because it was so meaningful to me to keep my memories alive. In 2019, I started a big catch-up project called Revive55 Project, spending 55 weeks, ending on my birthday to get all my memories back in order. I wanted to stop feeling overwhelmed and scared that I would lose my memories. Of course, I had the memories in my head, but photos and memorabilia help us to remember. When we see a photo, we often say "oh right, I remember that". You may have felt that when you saw a Facebook memory pop up on your feed that you had forgotten about.

So much was happening with our kids in their teen years, and without scrapbooking, I felt like I would forget all the moments. Scrapbooking helps us to remember because we are going through and reliving those moments as we scrapbook. 

Some of the things I worked on that year, I realized weren't really time well spent; and other times, I wondered how we could do it more efficiently, and revive our memories in a way that it doesn't take so long. Because really, we don't want to be stuck in the past reliving our old memories. We want to relive them but not all the time. We want to also chase dreams, look to the future as we are living in the moment. We want to capture new memories, not just preserve our old ones. That's where Present Harmony comes in that we look back with gratitude of our memories we loved and we look forward with hope of capturing new memories and all of that happens in the present.

In the present, we're looking back. In the present, we're looking forward. Our future will become our present. That's why I wanted to find a better and more efficient way of preserving our memories so it's not as overwhelming a process as it could be if we tried to continue to preserve our memories in the digital world like we did in the film world. That old way didn't work for me anymore, so I wanted to explore new ways of preserving our memories.

Introducing: Present Harmony

When I started my 60T🖤60 Project, I gave myself the goal to hold the book I was writing in my hands on my 60th birthday. My daughter then encouraged me to release some of the pressure by commiting to holding my first draft in my hands rather than what I felt was the perfectly finished book.

In 2019 when I started my Revive55 Project, I thought I might write a book about preserving memories, but what I realized was that I was as passionate about chasing dreams as about memories. I wondered whether to have two separate books. My tagline on my website and my newsletters was "chasing dreams...capturing memories". 

What I found was that in the present, we travel back in time to remember happy moments from the past and travel forward in time to plan future memories we’ll want to capture. Although the moments were in the past, the act of remembering happens in the present. Although we dream of the future, the act of dreaming happens now. The present is when and where the magic happens. When our future dreams become reality, they will happen in the present. Our future will become our present.

Present was my word of the year in 2022 and Harmony was my word of the year for 2023 and 2024. I loved putting them together for my book title. We find harmony in the present moment by looking back at our best moments in the past and dreaming of ideal moments in the future. This balancing of looking back and looking forward brings peace and harmony as we live our lives in a way that values our most meaningful dreams and memories. 

The chapters cover the following topics:

1. Knowing ourselves. Who we were; who we are and who we intend to be.
2. Understanding what and why we remember certain things and not others.
3. Envisioning our dreams and how to make them happen.
4. The power of serendipity, synchronicity, the law of attraction and manifestation.
5. The highlights and what I learned about memories during my Revive55 Project.
6. The importance of creating space and the struggle with letting go.
7. Reviving our most meaningful and treasured memories.
8. Connecting moments that weave together to become more meaningful.
9. Embracing technology as a mindset for memory keeping.
10. The importance of focusing on the present.
11. My focus during my 60T🖤60 Project.

I share my journey and what I have learned over the years of researching, teaching and writing about memories, chasing dreams and the importance of the present moment. My hope is that something will resonate with those who read it; and it will inspire them to balance past memories and future dreams to achieve present harmony.

Leap Day CN Tower Memories

Leap Day 2024 was more memorable than I could have imagined. In a previous post, I wrote I wanted to experience my second memorable Leap Day after only having memories of Leap Day 2020. You can read it here.

I made plans to celebrate with a CN Tower theme, since I wouldn't be travelling like I did on Leap Day 2020. Sometimes, we can make plans for something special that doesn't work out like we hoped.

I booked dinner at the Writers Room Bar at the Park Hyatt Hotel which completely exceeded my expectations. I had a seat with a view of the CN Tower and the sunset. The food and the service were exceptional. A woman sitting a couple of tables from us shared a photo she took of me taking a photo of my husband with the CN Tower in the background.

It surprised me that the patio doors were open in the winter so we could go outside and take better photos.

I especially love this Toronto Skyline photo with the beautiful sunset coloured clouds.

This was a perfect prelude to our evening painting of the Toronto skyline at Pinot's Palette. I didn't think I'd be able to paint anything that resembled the Toronto skyline, but the instructor was amazing in walking us through and showing each step. We were in a roomful of beautiful Toronto skylines. Every painting I saw looked beautiful, whether a beginner or an experienced artist made it.

Earlier in the day, I completed the CN Tower gingerbread "house" that I had purchased at Christmas time and had frozen when we didn't do it during the holidays. Unfortunately, I should have trimmed two of the cookies for the base of the tower since one was shorter, but I only thought of it once I saw the challenge of putting it together. It ended up a little lopsided, but I still enjoyed doing it. I took a time-lapse of the process. I started by melting sugar to make the glue that would hold things together.

A few days before Leap Day, I started a Toronto Skyline 4D puzzle. I hoped to complete it by Leap Day, but it took a lot longer than I expected. 

This is a time-lapse of the puzzle making up to Toronto in 1989. 

I paused at this point to enjoy seeing Toronto as it was when we first moved here. I especially loved adding the condo building we lived in then. It's all by itself on The Esplanade near Front and Yonge. 

It no longer has the view it did and is now surrounded by many buildings I still need to add to the puzzle. I'll continue the puzzle in the next few weeks to complete it by April 16 or 4/16 to reflect Toronto's original area code (416). I'll also finish the photo book I started that was focusing on the CN Tower, but recognizing that the view from the CN Tower is Toronto, so it will be a perfect time to finish the album.

I love looking at the changes over the years which goes along with the 4D puzzle of placing the buildings in chronological order. I like looking at the same view from different times. This photo on the left is the building I lived in when I first moved here. It's one of my favourite buildings in Toronto being flat-ironed shape. I could see our unit window from the CN Tower when we took this photo in 2005. I can't imagine living there now; having lost the view of the CN Tower and Lake Ontario.

Other comparisons make for happier memories, like seeing a parking lot in the 1970s become the Roy Thompson Hall in later photos. It's interesting to see how much Toronto has changed in the last few decades, especially in comparison with the CN Tower and its views. My photo book will include photos I have taken from 1978 to Leap Day 2024 adding to my Leap Day memories.

If you read my original post about planning a special Leap Day, I hope I inspired you to experience a memorable Leap Day. If you're reading this at another time, I hope I inspire you to make what could be an ordinary day, like April 16th, into one that is a little more extraordinary.

Leap Day Memories

Leap day was just an extra day until coincidentally I travelled to Hawaii on Leap Day 2020. Now I want to celebrate every Leap Day! I’m not travelling this time. Since I LOVE the CN Tower, I am having a CN Tower theme celebration to better remember Leap Day 2024. 

Do you have memories from past Leap Days? Special days give us the opportunity to make memories. TimeHop is a phone app that shows you past photos and social media posts from today's date. I opened my TimeHop app on February 29th 2020 and had no memories. No photos and no social media posts. I had never made a point of doing something or capturing something on Leap Day before (that I can remember).

The title on my calendar page in 2020 gave me the idea to make Leap Day amazing! I wrote a blog post in 2020 that you can read by clicking here.

Celebrating a day makes it more memorable. We want to involve all our senses and add uniqueness to better remember the moments. I also ensured that I captured unique moments by taking photos of ways I could recreate later. Something as simple, yet unusual, were the mini gold sparkling wine bottles we had on the plane. I recently saw these at LCBO and bought some to celebrate this year.

When we arrived at the resort, instead of my regular glass of wine, I had my first ever Mai Tai on the beach. I think of Leap Day whenever I hear or think of Mai Tais.

This year, I'll be staying in Toronto for Leap Day but I am planning on making it a memorable day. I imagine being a tourist coming to Toronto. What would be on my list of things to do if I didn't live here?

Luckily or gratefully, I have done most of the big tourist attractions that I'm interested in. I went up the CN Tower as recently as last summer and have had meals in the revolving restaurant on a few special occasions. Going again would not make Leap Day memorable. I wanted to find something I hadn't done before.

I searched for Hawaiian restaurants in Toronto and learned that there's a poke place just down the road from me. I had seen the word Poke in a couple of places and figured that they were restaurants who also served Poke, but this one is actually a Hawaiian Poke restaurant. My husband had a few pokes while in Hawaii but it's not really my favourite, so I kept searching. I found a Tiki bar that could be fun to have a drink at. 

But then I wondered if I wanted to make Leap Day have a Hawaiian theme or if I wanted to do something different. I celebrate Lei Day on May 1st with a Hawaiian theme. Wouldn't going to a Tiki Bar be more fun when it's hot? I let go of recreating Leap Day Hawaiian memories but made a mental note to go to the Tiki Bar this summer.

I love a view so I researched restaurants and bars that have a view of the CN Tower. Being up the CN Tower is amazing, but you don't actually get to see the Tower; except for its shadow. My husband took this incredible photo in 2019.

I have been to a few places with a view of the CN Tower, but I wanted to go somewhere different. I booked a table for a before-dinner drink (or early dinner) at The Writers Room Bar at the Park Hyatt (Avenue Road and Bloor) just in time for the sunset (hopefully we end up with a table with a view of the CN Tower and the sunset). I am writing a book, so I liked the writing theme.

"Writers Room is a reimagined interpretation of the revered rooftop bar's 50 years storied past, paying homage to the history of literary legends who shared moments in the space."

I wish my palette wasn't so picky or I'd order a drink from the "curated selection of stirred cocktails, inspired by renowned Canadian literary icons." We'll see if I am adventurous like I was in Hawaii when I ordered a Mai Tai (not as adventurous as the cocktails at The Writers Room Bar); or settle for a glass of wine.

I kept searching for other unusual things to do in Toronto and saw a few ideas, but nothing that seemed special enough. I then googled "bucket list" Toronto and came across an Instagram account called Toronto Bucket List (@torbucketlist).

They had a recent post with 8 Date Ideas for Valentine's Day that included "Paint & Sip at Pinot's Palette". Intrigued, I went to their website and saw the class they offered that night (a couple of days after Valentine's Day) was "Monet's Lily Pond - Date Night". I LOVE Monet and I LOVE hearts! 

It was perfect for me, but it was the last night they were offering it. I scrolled down through their schedule. In a few days, there would be a Monet bridge class and a tropical one (great if I hadn't seen the Monet heart). As I continued to scroll, I thought, we'll see what the Leap Day class is, and whether it's meant to be.

I couldn't believe that it was this:

I LOVE the CN Tower AND sunsets!! How serendipitously perfect!! I had tears in my eyes realizing I had a reservation at a place with a CN Tower view and the sunset! The timing would be tight (I changed the restaurant reservation for earlier) but will still need to rush over to the painting place after the sunset.

I took an acrylic painting course once. We learned very basic paintings like this one I painted:

I don't know if I could paint the CN Tower scene well enough, but it will be a memorable way to celebrate Leap Day. When I wrote a list of dreams in 1996, I wrote "to write a song I like". Perhaps I will paint the Toronto Skyline in a way that I like by the next Leap Day (no pressure for this Leap Day). I'll keep trying until I can take it out to enjoy on February 29, 2028.

This gives me another idea for Leap Day. At Christmas, I bought a CN Tower-themed gingerbread house.

It ended up not working out for us to make it, so I put it in the freezer. How perfect, that I could make a CN Tower gingerbread house and then go (try to) paint the CN Tower at night!!

I may be ridiculously overdoing it, but I also have a CN Tower 4-D puzzle I haven't completed.

This is sounding like I will celebrate Leap WEEK...😂. I can't complete this puzzle in one day, so will start it and hope to complete it by Leap Day.

The 4th dimension of a 4D puzzle is time. The puzzle includes a time poster that will lead me through time as I rebuild Toronto’s skyline history. I have been up the CN Tower many times over its 48 years. The first time being for a Grade 7 school trip. When I first moved to Toronto, I lived on The Esplanade and would see the CN Tower when I walked to Union Station every work day. I wish I carried a camera with me in those days. I love to take a photo of the CN Tower, especially when I see it from a different view.

I'm also happy to complete projects I had plans to do "someday". Someday is now. I love connecting moments from the past while creating new memories to make it more meaningful.

I have wanted to make a CN Tower photo album for years. I am going to take this celebration as the nudge I need to get it done. The Toronto skyline has changed so much in the last few decades. It will be interesting to revive those memories by looking back at my photos while making the puzzle. 

How do we do a theme album or project that doesn't have an end date? Create an artificial deadline, so I will make a CN Tower album that will end with the photos I take on Leap Day 2024.

Christmas Memories

Part 6 of my 60T🖤60 Project began on November 19th and ended on December 23rd. (For more information about my 60T🖤60 project, go to my other blog My Life Is Like A Song) Seeing that end date, and knowing that sometimes, I sprint to a deadline to complete a mini-project; making Part 6 have a Christmas theme seemed the smartest thing to do. I didn't want to be focusing on a different theme the week before Christmas.

When our kids were young, I often felt rushed when Christmas came around. I procrastinate naturally, but with a family birthday in mid December, I would wait to get a tree or decorate until after we had celebrated the birthday. I had read or heard from parenting experts to ensure that a child gets to celebrate their birthday separately from the Christmas celebrations, and I accepted this advice by not letting our house become too Christmassy until after the birthday. 

I have to admit that in mid-November this year, I was not feeling cheerful or excited about Christmas coming. I was already feeling stressed, overwhelmed and not in a celebratory mood. 

Focusing my project on Christmas would force me to look at the positives and help to make Christmas more festive. Coincidentally, on the day that my project started, I attended a "Spill The Tea" event by Tea With Tracie where Brenda Jasmin was speaking about infusing more joy and less stress during the holidays. One of the activities was for us to determine what made us happy; our "Ho Ho Ho list" and what drained us or things we wanted to let go of; our "Ho Ho Heck No" list. It was perfect timing to start Part 6 of my 60T🖤60 Project. I wanted to focus on what I loved the most and let go of what I didn't.

Photos

My first activity was to gather past Christmas memories and create a Christmas-themed photobook. Looking back at happy times lifted my mood. I didn't complete it in time to order for Blurb's Black Friday sale so I decided to show it digitally to my family at Christmas before completing it, in case they had extra photos or memories they wanted to share to improve it. (That was the plan but it dien't work out the way I hoped).

Looking back at all our Christmas cards gave me the idea to display them on our "living frame". A few years ago, my husband took an old frame, removed the broken glass, and added wire with clips to hold photos. We rotate photos depending on seasons or celebrations. Normally at Christmas, we add photos taken at Christmas time, but I liked focusing on our Christmas cards or photos we sent with Christmas cards when I didn't order actual photo cards.

Last year I ordered snowball garlands. I thought the balls would be bigger than they ended up being when I received them. I was happy that one of them fit perfectly around our living frame to make it more festive.

Christmas Card

I wasn't sure whether to send Christmas cards this year, especially as more and more people are choosing to end the tradition. We didn't have a recent family photo; and we lost our dog this year. 

Working on my Christmas photobook and seeing our past Christmas cards, gave me the idea to have Christmas memories as a theme for the card. We had festive family photos over the years that we had never shared because they were taken at Christmas or New Year's; when our Christmas cards would have already been sent. I included a photo with our dog; a photo with the kids' partners. I included the new card in the living frame (top middle).  I wanted to let people know the news about our dog, so added the sad news in a fun rhyme.

Getting together and telling stories
Looking back at Christmas memories
Excited as we anticipate making more
Before we reach 2024

(couple of more private lines)
This year was sad saying goodbye to our pup
The house is sadly quieter but needs less cleanup

Festive decorating is coming along
We’ll enjoy our favourite Christmas movie or song
A dusting of snow sets the mood
Menus will mix classics with new found food

May your Christmas be spent with friends and family
On New Year’s Eve, pop the Bublé or bubbly
While making a wish upon a star
“Joy for our loved ones near and far”

Music

I love Christmas music and especially love new Christmas songs over traditional ones. I used to have CDs of our favourite Christmas songs, but with technology changes, when we switched from iTunes to Apple Music, I lost those playlists. This project encouraged me to search and add old and new Christmas songs in a playlist (almost 500 songs!) in order to create a top 20 favourite songs playlist.

I really enjoyed listening to my favourite songs during the holiday season. My in-laws arrived at Christmas with a CD we made for them in the late 1990's or early 2000's.

I found it interesting how different this list was to my current one.

Every year, I love playing Christmas songs on the piano. This year was extra fun trying to learn songs on the ukulele. I initially thought I'd learn the Hawaiian Song Mele Kalikimaka; but it ended up being too difficult for me, so I found a couple of easier ones to learn.

Last year I tried to compose a Christmas melody. I wondered what made a melody sound Christmassy if it didn't have Christmas lyrics. I found some chord progressions that are popular in Christmas songs but didn't compose anything I liked. I enjoyed trying again this year, but still no success. One of these years, I'll compose a Christmas melody I will love. I'm adding that to my wishlist like I did in 1996 when I added "to write a song I like" on my list of dreams.

Movies

Last year, our daughter wrote a list of movies and shows to watch and put it on the fridge. I stored it with the Christmas decorations to continue the tradition. With a little research, I created a new list that we kept on the fridge this eyar. This helped in the decision-making process. We didn't need to keep searching streaming apps to figure out what to watch since I already did that to compile the list. When we watched one, we'd colour the bullet. I stored the list with the decorations again this year to be reminded to continue to complete watching it; or to re-print an updated list.

Gifts

Shopping for me is often stressful because I don't like buying something for the sake of buying something, but this year, I found meaningful gifts and had lots of help from my daughter that made me happy with the gifts I was giving.

Sometimes I also feel that if we are feeling happier, we are open to seeing clues for what we are looking for. In contrast, if we are feeling negative, clues pass us by without us noticing. I like to think that my improved mentality helped for me to find great ideas for gifts.

For many years, our kids decorated a gingerbread house during the holidays. 

I serendipitously found a gingerbread house that included the CN Tower, Rogers Centre, and downtown Toronto. I thought it would be a fun Christmas time activity for us to build it.

Food

While making the photobook, seeing photos of treats and foods we love at Christmas time helped me plan better and get the ingredients I needed early. I made favourites like tourtière (French Canadian meatpie) and sweetheart cookies (jam thumbprint cookies sometimes with marshmallows). 

Instead of my traditional shortbread recipe, I tried a new sugar cookie recipe cut in hearts and snowflakes  that turned out great (forgot to take a photo). A newer tradition is to make scones with cream. This year, our daughter found a bakery that sold homemade scones and traditional British clotted cream with homemade butter.

My French-Canadian heritage, mixed with my husband's British heritage, adds up to delicious treats.

When I first spent Christmas with my husband's family, they introduced me to a British tradition called Christmas crackers. Two people hold a cracker until it pops to reveal a paper crown/hat, a toy and a joke. When I popped mine, I felt a little disappointed at first by the yellow crown (instead of my favorite purple), but I was thrilled to find a heart keychain, just like the one I got last year. What a coincidence! (I love hearts in case you haven't been a regular reader of my blog)

Looking back at photos reminded me how much I love seeing Christmas lights around the city. I had hoped to visit the Eaton Centre, Nathan Phillips Square, the Distillery District or Inglewood "Kringlewood" Drive lined with giant inflatable Santas; like we had in the past or the new Illumi light festival in Mississauga, but I ended up not in the mood with the rainy weather. 

Even if I focused on Christmas Memories to help make Christmas more festive and meaningful, plans don't always go as we hope. With COVID visiting our family, and us not being all together, the gingerbread pieces and royal icing ended up in the freezer. My Christmas-themed photobook was saved for next year.

It's a good reminder that life is filled with ups and downs. Everything isn't always perfect, but we can make the best of what is presented to us.

This reminds me of a great quote: "Things turn out best for those who make the best of the way things turn out." 

Present Memories

 I deserve a thank-you note

For giving you my presence all year long

I deserve a thank you note

That's the only present that I want

(Thank You Note by Salem Ilese)

I focused on "Present Memories" during part 4 of my 60T🖤60 Project (for more information about my 60T🖤60 project, go to my other blog My Life Is Like A Song). Present Memories is the subject of the book I want to complete by the end of my project. It also worked out well because I was invited to speak at a mothers' group during this period.

The deadline of my presentation added extra motivation to work on my book. I wrote, and wrote and wrote until I realized that it would take me all day to present it. It was still really useful to gain clarity and better organize the topics. The reason I called Part 4 "Present Memories" is that I believe we should focus on memories that improve our present. Our happiness happens in the present. 

It's helpful to travel back in time to understand what matters most and then travel forward in time to where we want to be and the memories we want to create. Once we’ve looked back and forward, we want to capture what matters most and enjoy the memories in the present. 

During the presentation, I covered strategies that research has shown to explain what and why we remember some things rather than others. I gave ideas on how to better remember what matters most. Being able to remember meaningful moments in our lives provides us and our kids a sense of self and identity. It helps us grow and connect with each other. Our memories are the story of our lives.

By enjoying our memories, we can make ordinary days into happier days because every day can’t be extraordinary, otherwise they would become ordinary.

We remember what we pay attention to.

To remember, we need to notice and this requires our attention and our perception - what we see, what we hear, what we smell and what we feel - physically and emotionally.

In the present moment, our memory is limited and short-lived. We remember what we experience only long enough to use it or not. If we don’t make a point of remembering what we experienced, we will forget it in 15-30 seconds and those memories will be replaced by the next information. Life keeps happening.

We remember moments that are significant to us. We could all go on an outing together and remember it differently. We would remember what we pay attention to; what gives us an emotional reaction and what adds meaning for us.

If we want to forget an event or an unpleasant moment; it's best to not think about it. By paying attention to that unpleasant moment, we are helping to remember it.

The other way that memories become meaningful is when we connect them together. We can’t remember everything. We want to be selective and relate what matters to other moments and how they relate to our life story and how we see the world.

Spatial Repetition

Research has found that spaced repetition helps us to remember. It’s like when we were in school, we remember better by reviewing after periods of time that become larger. So when something amazing happens that we want to remember, it will help to review it the next day, then a week later, a month later, three months later and a year later.

We also remember what we think about. We remember the stories we tell, the photos or videos we look at and we remember what we write. Journaling, blogging or sharing on social media helps us remember by writing and then by re-reading the details that may fade over time.

Focus on what we want to remember. 

The key to preserving memories for the future is to recognize what is worth capturing and letting go of the rest. Optimists pay attention to positive experiences, and so these events are remembered. Struggles are good to remember if they are relevant to the journey or they’re important lessons, but dwelling on negative experiences can lead to unhappiness and sometimes depression.

Bliss Point

I began my Revive55 Project in 2019 in order to preserve my memories and hopefully remember more but are more memories better? Is there a bliss point when it comes to memories? What is the perfect balance of enough memories so that they are optimally enjoyed but not too many so that they are lost in the clutter?

When we don’t curate our lives as we live them, eventually we will drown in the memories. One memory box becomes two becomes four becomes eight. 1000 photos becomes 5000 becomes 25000, etc.

It’s easier to keep up than to catch up.

This project was necessary for me because I had let things accumulate. As the years passed, I kept collecting more and more sentimental items without letting go of old ones. I wish I had been more proactive and found a better way sooner. 

Catching up is a project. Keeping up is a process. By putting a process in place to keep up with our memory keeping, we don’t need to do a big catch up project later and we also enjoy our memories along the way. 

That is one of the key things for memory keeping. Keep up the workflow and process of our memories so we don’t have to tackle it all at once later.

Hedonic Adaptation refers to the tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness after experiencing positive or negative events or life changes. 

It’s when we experience an identical stimulus that provides less pleasure the more it’s consumed. For example, a new car feels amazing at first, but eventually, it’s just a car. People who get a big bonus or a pay raise may be happier for a short period of time, but then will settle back to their original level of happiness. People may lose their job and be sadder for a short period of time, but then will settle back to their original level of happiness. 

Our favourite treat or our favourite song may get an emotional response when we haven’t tasted it or heard it in a long time, but if we have it every day or listen to it over and over again, the emotional response diminishes.

We can prevent hedonic adaptation by not enjoying our memories too often, but we also have to enjoy our memories to ensure we remember them.  It’s a fine line. Not too often, not too rarely.

There is also something magical about finding something we haven’t seen in 10 or 20 years, like a time capsule taking us back. This is great for things that are more factual, like report cards or things that we’ll be amazed how much things have changed.

Revive From Archive

Chronological photo albums or digital collections are a great resource like a library, but we don't necessarily want to read every book or look back at every photo. The meaningful moments can become lost in the clutter or what I call: the archive.

Art galleries and museums own much more than they show on display. Much of their collection is in storage.

I want to encourage you to Revive From Your Archive. Rather than organizing all your photos, revive your most meaningful ones. 

Curating exhibitions by theme is a more interesting way to enjoy our memories.

I love going to the art gallery when they have exhibitions where they display pieces of art from various places in the world and connect them in a meaningful way. 

Art galleries will also curate special exhibitions by connecting pieces by artist, by theme or by time period. These exhibitions highlight the art in a way that makes us appreciate it even more than a single painting. Sometimes in the exhibits, they showcase mementos, letters, or timelines, not just pieces of art.

It helps to tell the artist’s story or a story of a time period. Our special exhibition can tell a more meaningful story than just one photo. 

Our permanent collection should be what is most important to us and our family. They are our milestones and our peak moments. They are the people we love. They may have mementos connected to them and stories. They are the photos and mementos that we display in our house or screensavers. They are the first things we see when we enter our home or the last things we see when we go to bed at night. It showcases who we are and what is important to us.

When we first put photos in frames for our permanent collection, we notice them and they made us feel happy, but eventually, we stop noticing them. Taking something out that has been put away for months, brings back the magic. It's best to not let our permanent collection become too permanent.

Our special exhibitions are the interesting stories that will link some things to others. They could focus on one family member, like an art gallery may have a special exhibition on one artist. It  could focus on places weu’ve been; on activities we love to do; on our traditions; then and now comparisons; changes over the years; etc. We can also use mementos or household items to enhance the theme.

They don’t have to be big projects either. Sometimes I make a card with old photos of the person. I’ve used a cartoon app to alter the image for special moments. I have made collages on an 8.5x11 page or photobooks for really special birthdays. Using iMovie or Final Cut Pro, I’ve also made highlight videos with little snippets over the years.

By using our photos to make these gifts or cards, we are spending time with our memories instead of time going shopping for gifts and cards.  This helps us to remember.

The first special exhibition that I recommend you create is about you. Who were you? What did you love to do when you were young? As we grow up, other people influence us whether that is well-meaning parents and teachers or mean or envious classmates. As Charles Bukowski wrote: “Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?” If you have childhood photos and mementos that you haven’t sorted through, this is a great time to look to recognize what is most meaningful for you. Being a new parent can be a way to reconnect with your younger self.

1. By looking back, we can see who we were. 
2. By being present and noticing our current life, we can see who we are. 
3. By looking forward, we can be proactive in being who we want to be. 

I printed three pages with photo memories I created with these 3 themes to remind me at times when life gets busy of who I intend to be so that I choose better actions today to get me there.

Present Memories

Studies show that remembering happy times from the past helps us be happy in the present and gives us a hopeful vision for the future. As long as they bring back happy memories, it will boost our happiness.

Look back to connect meaningful moments. Look forward to create more and capture them and savour them in the present.

The end goal is a workflow that works - it’s that feeling of the moments that matter being captured and preserved. We connect the dots through our life to figure out what we love, what we connect with and what matters to us. 

We can extend that happy moment, by anticipating it - for example anticipating a vacation or an outing - and then reflecting by enjoying the photos or stories afterwards. Studies show that we can boost our happiness by keeping happy memories in our mind. So taking the time like organizing our photos, taking videos, keeping mementos around is a happiness strategy.

In the present, remember happy times from the past and plan for future memories.

Embrace technology

While preparing this presentation, my MacBook crashed. If I hadn't backed up and synced my photos and memories; I would have been forced to spend almost as much repairing an older computer that wouldn't end up lasting as long as a new one. I had learned how to ensure that technology failures did not impact my memory keeping so the only pain I got from my computer crashing was financial. I spoke about technology in my presentation, but it's too lengthy for this post. The most important thing is to embrace technology, learn how your devices work and what would happen if they broke. Would your memories still be preserved?

Conclusion

Our memories are inside us. They are not the photos, videos and mementos. Floods, fires and technology losses happen. 

The photos and mementos help us to remember. We can keep the memories alive by spending time enjoying our photos, mementos and memories; not too often and not too rarely.

The key to preserving future memories is to recognize what is worth capturing.

Chasing dreams...capturing memories.

Happiness Lab Podcast Live in Toronto

I have been interested in happiness for as long as I can remember. My first blog post in May 2008 referenced lyrics from the song Happy by Natasha Bedingfield. When I first heard of Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project, I started reading her blog. I later got the chance to meet Gretchen when she was at my local Indigo store in Toronto, promoting The Happiness Project book launch in February 2010. You can read my blog post about it here. 

I read her follow-up happiness books as she released them, learning and implementing thoughts and actions to live a happier life. Eventually, I wasn't writing or reading blogs as much. I tried to get into podcasts but the ones I listened to (my husband's favourites on road trips) although entertaining and informative, weren't captivating me. In December 2018, in my search for better podcasts (for me), I saw Happier with Gretchen Rubin on a list of top podcasts. I was so out of the Happiness Project loop; I hadn't realized that she had started a podcast in 2015. 

Serendipitously, as I began listening to her podcast, I learned she was offering The Happiness Project Experience which was starting a few days later. I signed up for the online course and community as a great way to celebrate the New Year 2019. To help with accountability, we could sign up to be placed in small groups. I mention this because I still FaceTime weekly with two of the friends I met virtually through that course.

In 2020, our small group started the course over. Then, at the beginning of the pandemic, a group member (ECP) shared a free Yale Course (via Coursera): The Science of Well-Being taught by Dr. Laurie Santos. Some of us signed up together and discussed it during our Happiness Project Experience communications. I loved learning more about health and happiness, especially the research and science behind the findings.

I have been listening to Gretchen Rubin's podcast Happier and The Happiness Lab podcast (with Dr. Laurie Santos) for years. What a surprise to see that The Happiness Lab podcast was going to be recorded live in Toronto with Gretchen as the guest for the Hot Docs Festival. I only saw it advertised a few days before the event on Gretchen's social media, so I'm happy there were still tickets available.

The theme of the podcast was Gretchen's new book Life in Five Senses. I especially love this topic because the senses are so important in relation to our memories. 

When I was in Hawaii, just before the pandemic, I purchased products to use on so when I use them at home, I'm reminded of being in Hawaii. I inadvertently experienced this on my honeymoon when I bought expensive (and amazingly scented) sunscreen. It reminded me of my first Caribbean trip when I smelled that sunscreen for years - until they changed the scent.

In the Science of Well-Being course, I learned about hedonic adaptation: 

"Hedonic adaptation refers to the notion that after positive (or negative) events, and a subsequent increase in positive (or negative) feelings, people return to a relatively stable, baseline level of affect" (Diener, Lucas, & Scollon, 2006)

With the Hawaiian product example, what this means is that it feels amazing at first, but if we were to use it every day, it would lose its positive effect. I still have that incredible feeling when I smell it, because I do so sparingly. 

Looking at this another way, one of Gretchen's "personal commandments" is to "spend out". By this, she means to use things up instead of hoarding and trusting in abundance. I learned the benefit of spending out the hard way after a Caribbean trip in 2016. I bought extra bottles of resort shampoo and lotion that we loved to use during our stay. On my return home, I used them so sparingly that eventually, the product deteriorated and it didn't smell as great as it did on holiday. 

It's a fine line between "spending out" often enough, but not too often so that it loses its magic.

I loved seeing two of my favourite happiness experts sharing the stage. After the initial introduction of Gretchen's book, they answered questions from audience members. The podcast episode entitled "Ask Us Anything! Laurie and Gretchen Take Your Questions (Live From Toronto) was posted on The Happiness Lab Podcast on May 30th. Click here to listen.

I am enjoying reading Gretchen's Life in Five Senses and being reminded to use all of my senses to create happier memories. 

In saying that, though, I disagree with Gretchen regarding her Five Senses Quiz. After taking the quiz, we discover our "neglected" sense. She believes we can raise our happiness by exploring the sense that we use the least. She shares tips on how to explore this sense.

I believe that it's our neglected sense for a reason and my happiness level would better increase by exploring the senses that are my favourite. Receiving the tips for my neglected sense after taking the quiz was disappointing for me. It did not tempt me to try them.

Looking at her list of 50 Tips to Get Out of Your Head Using Your Five Senses on her website, I am most excited to try the tips that feature sight, smell and hearing. They're my top 3 senses, or as Gretchen calls them, my foreground senses. Click here to read her post about foreground and background senses. She believes that bringing all five senses into the foreground increases our happiness. 

I prefer to explore my favourite senses by trying new experiences; and to better appreciate my neglected senses by noticing what I love about them (rather than exploring new things). I haven't finished the book, so I should probably give Gretchen's way a try. Since I am most interested in memories, using all five senses for memory keeping may be of better use for me, rather than everyday happiness.

Gretchen always says that what works for one person doesn't necessarily work for another person, so there's also a good chance that I will find that I prefer it my way; to focus more on my preferred senses.

Revive From Archive: Meaningful Moments

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II passed away yesterday. When moments occur that mean something to me, I love to revive memories relating to these events.

Her passing reminded me of the last time Queen Elizabeth visited Toronto in 2010. This was a time in my life when I didn't say...maybe I'll go next time. I had been to the Vancouver Olympics a few months before and wanted to continue to pursue my passions (and interests). 

When I learned that The Queen would be in Toronto, I decided to go with my SLR camera in hand. I am grateful that I did since she never came back and I love the photos I captured.

 

I'm thankful that I wrote a blog post about my day because it is reminding me of details that I had forgotten. You can read it and see more photos here. There was a lot of luck (or synchronicity) and resourcefulness involved in capturing the photos. Looking through the photos on my current computer, there is one that I included on my blog that I don't have. This reminds me that I still have photos from that day on an old computer that I want to revive.

The other thing I want to do is to connect moments with this story. I haven't figured out how I want to capture these connected stories yet. Do I want to put everything together in a video format? A photo album? Memory box? In an app/website? For now, I am just making a list of the moments I want to connect like:

• Seeing Prince Charles (now King Charles III) and meeting Camilla (now Queen Consort) at the Royal Agricultural Winter Fair in 2009 (click here for my blog post)
• My first time seeing Buckingham Palace in 1992
• Tower of London visit including view of Crown Jewels in 1992 with the guard saying "Move along; they're just diamonds" that made us laugh.
• Diana death (where and when I heard the news); Diana memorial fountain in London; exhibit in Toronto (where I bought an English Rose tea cup and maybe a program? - I want to revive that memory of the exhibit)
• Seeing Buckingham Palace July 7 2005 (the day of the London bombings)
• Royal York Hotel - my visit for a meeting
• Buckingham Palace tour in 2018
• Growing up in a town she visited as a Princess (in lieu of her ill father King George VI)
• Queen anniversary cards to my parents and parents-in-law
• Queen Jubilee Morning Melody I composed 
• Queen Elizabeth II death (where and when I heard the news); interviewed by CTV News

As I remember other moments that fit in this category or experience more, I can include them to add even more connections. I love the idea of putting all these stories together somehow. It adds more meaning when they are all together.

AGO Exhibition: I Am Here

It’s a song

Nothing’s wrong

Everything is clear

I am here.

(I Am Here by David Wall)*

I'm happy I learned that the exhibition I Am Here: Home Movies and Everyday Masterpieces was at the AGO, less than a week before it was leaving. I missed the original (and subsequent) announcements.

This exhibition speaks so much to my love of memories and documenting our lives. This is how the AGO presented the exhibition:

The exhibition was divided by theme. I took a photo of each title sign and put them in this collage.
The themes included Our House, We Are Family, Food Glorious Food, Fight The Power, Dance To The Music, My Favourite Things, On The Street Where You Live, Life Is A Highway, Everyday People, and Panorama.

In the middle of the Home and Family areas, was a collection of lost albums that really had me thinking about how photo albums have changed over the years. For almost a century, people have told their life stories with photo albums. How will the next generation tell their life stories?

The exhibition included many home movies including "baby's breakfast" which may be the first home movie ever recorded by Louis Lumière in 1895. This reminded me of seeing another Louis Lumière film of workers leaving a factory at a previous exhibition. 

I Am Here also showed how home movies have changed since its inception with a special focus on protests captured on our smart phones in the past decade. This part of the exhibition was very insightful and thought-provoking.

I was inspired by the "Mixtape Diaries" by Glynnis Grant-Henderson. I create yearly playlists of the songs I love each year. I have often blogged about them, but I loved the journals that Glynnis created. My husband has made over 200 mixtapes (back in the cassette days). It would be amazing to have some thoughts to transport us back to what he was thinking when he made them.

Another exhibit that had me thinking was one of Andy Warhol's 600 memory boxes. It contained 595 objects that the gallery described as falling into the category of the everyday like Christmas cards, newspaper clippings, doodles and tax forms. As fascinating as it was to see a glimpse of an art icon; it's a reminder to me that as much as I love memories and memorabilia; less is more meaningful and I prefer curating my memories.

I love connected moments, so I especially appreciated this graphic showing the timeline from cave paintings to Tik Tok.

The exhibition ended with a collection of vignettes representing themes of "home-movieness". The 26 themes were titled alphabetically and included a song, I Am Here by David Wall that really resonated with me. You can see a few examples of the themes and here I Am Here in this video posted by the AGO. You can also read more about the Panorama compilation by clicking here.

I saw this exhibition at the perfect time, as I am focusing on Revive From Archive and organizing memories like art galleries curate exhibitions.

*Lyrics as I hear them. Apologies if there's a mistake

Lullabies & Legacies

I received an email in the spring from Massey Hall & Roy Thomson Hall that caught my attention. The subject line was "Help share a lifetime of memories. Donate to the Lullaby Project today".

The word memories always catches my attention. I had missed a few earlier emails that described it: "The Lullaby Project pairs expectant parents with artists to write, record, and perform a personal lullaby – a bond and connection to last a lifetime."

I couldn't resist donating to the campaign since music is a large part of my life and my memories. I loved the idea of composing a lullaby and wish I had when I was expecting. Interestingly, the first songs I composed were 11 months prior to the birth of my fist child, but they weren't melodies that I would sing or hum to my kids. They would have heard me play them on the piano though.

I remember singing Yellow by Coldplay to my daughter. 

🎵Look at the stars; look how they shine for you

And everything you do Yeah, they were all yellow

I came along I wrote a song for you

And all the things you do And it was called Yellow🎵

It's memorable because I had a friend over who liked that I wasn't singing typical "baby" songs but songs I loved. And my daughter liked it so why sing songs I don't like to her?  It's funny looking back that my daughter's favourite colour was yellow for a while and it still is one of her favourites. Coincidence?

I love lyrics and have often used lyrics to introduce my blog posts. Since I donated to the Lullaby Project, I received Supporter Newsletters. A few weeks ago, the newsletter highlighted the Lyrics & Legacies Project. This project pairs songwriters with seniors in a long term care home for them to write their life story in a song. I had goosebumps and happy tears reading about this project and listening to the songs they composed. You can hear them by clicking here. The lullabies can be heard here.

I donated to this project without hesitation. During the summer, I was participating in a Passion & Purpose Summer Series hosted by Brenda Jasmin where we were reading the book Passion To Purpose by Amy McLaren. I donated to Lyrics & Legacies after the 4th week of our 7 week series. The following week on our zoom call with the theme "Make an Impact", I told the group about this project and how it excited me. With two weeks to go before our last zoom call that would have the theme of Legacy & Vision, I decided to write a song to share with the group. 

I will write more about Passion To Purpose in another post but for now, I will just say that finding what moves us makes our lives more meaningful. Happy tears are a sign that I have found something that is meaningful to me. In her book, Amy believes that channeling our gifts and our giving (whether donating time or money) with causes we're passionate about will have a bigger impact.

It has me wondering about how I make donations. I like that I have automatic monthly donations set up so that my giving is more proactive, but I'm not passionate about many of the causes that I donate to. I believe they are important issues but they're not what I'm passionate about.

What if rather than having given my "regular" amount to the Lullabies & Legacies projects, I had given a more meaningful contribution?  Sometimes, we can have a bigger impact and involvement when we give more. Reading Passion To Purpose has me re-evaluating my donations.

Music and memories move me in so many ways and finding projects to support that include both made my heart sing.