Love Memories

It's one week until Valentine's Day. Although sometimes I let celebratory days come and go without celebrating; I find I'm happiest when I make an ordinary day a little more extraordinary.

Sometimes, we're busy with life and then, at the last minute, we settle for an okay celebration. We can make Valentine's Day or a love anniversary more memorable with a little planning. We can also look at Valentine's Day, which may not be as important to us, as a stepping stone towards a bigger anniversary celebration.

I'd like to share some ideas on how to use our memories for more meaningful celebrations. We can then capture memories we make in the present that we'll enjoy in the future. 

Photos

Many of us feel overwhelmed by our photo collection. A great way to take a small bite out of the overwhelming project of organizing our photos is to focus on a theme when these opportunities to celebrate come up. We can use these special days as nudges to take a small step forward in preserving our memories.

Although I love looking back at memories; our happiness occurs in the present, so we want to focus on memories that enhance our present. We can start by looking back at past celebrations. 

• What have we loved in the past and may want to recreate? 
• What are our favourite activities and foods? 
• What do we care the most about? 

We have tools to help make looking back easier. We can look at 

• our photos from past Valentine's Days
• calendars (do we have restaurant reservations or travel plans?)
• old bills or budgets (what stores or places did we spend in February?)

On an iPhone (and possibly other phones), if you search Valentine and then scroll down, past categories like "Photos", "Text Found in Photos", "Moments" or "Albums"; it shows "Dates". By clicking on "Valentine's Day", we can see photos taken on February 14th over the years.

When looking at these photos, we can put hearts or stars to rate our favourites or copy our favourites into a specialized folder or album.

On Valentine's Day, we can see memories using the TimeHop app that shows all photos and social media posts from that day when we link it to Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.

To see Facebook posts at any time, we can search our profile for keywords like Valentine; or by date (year and month), but this is more time consuming that doing it on Valentine's Day using the TimeHop app. I used to take screen captures of my favourite TimeHop memories so that they would be in my photos to look at any time.

Celebrations

When looking back at past celebrations:

• Which ones make you feel the happiest? 
• Do you prefer celebrations out or at home? 
• Do you prefer to splurge or spend mindfully?

We can recreate experiences or "recycle" them by returning to a restaurant or place we've been; or we can upcycle by adding something more extravagant or meaningful. Perhaps when we were younger, we didn't have the money for the full experience but now we could do it properly. For example, we used to go to fancy restaurants for a cheaper lunch rather than dinner or we would find a local place or cook foods from a place we've travelled to. Perhaps we've rushed a celebration in the past that we can upcycle by making it more meaningful with more thought and planning.

Cards

I love using photos to make greeting cards. Sometimes I print them and give paper copies and other times, I email or text a digital copy. I enjoy the creativity in creating my own cards, but the more important bonus is that I am spending time with my memories to find the photo(s) I want to use. By scrolling or searching through my photos, I am reminded of the stories and memories which helps me to remember. 

I love the BeCasso app that offers artistic filters to edit photos to make them look like a watercolour, a cartoon, pencil drawing or in the style of famous artists. I use the edited photos to make cards. I also use Creative Memories digital paper and decorations to create digital and printed cards using Pages or Canva. 

Food

Food and decorations are also important to me. I enjoy making heart-shaped cookies, cakes and pizzas. I love using love-themed dishes, mugs and glasses on Valentine's Day. It helps that I looove hearts. 

I store my heart-themed and past Valentine's cards (inside a box decorated with hearts) in a storage box that I open in February. When I open it, I'm surprised and excited to see my special items again and it reminds me of how happy I am when I celebrate! I love staying in on Valentine's Day to enjoy my memorabilia, but it's also special to go out.

We were on a family holiday one year and we enjoyed a special meal at the French restaurant of the resort.

We've been lucky to have had a few amazing trips that included Valentine's Day; looking back at these memories brings me happiness and hope that we'll plan future holidays in mid-February.

My husband and I have surprisingly, also been apart quite a few times on Valentine's Day. I would joke that it's Valentine's Day every day; so it's not a problem if we're not together celebrating on the actual day. Even when he's away, I enjoy celebrating with heart-shaped ravioli with lobster, a heart napkin and heart confetti. 

Many specialty grocery stores sell heart-shaped ravioli in February and this is a favourite tradition for me. The local shop in midtown Toronto I used to get it closed a few years ago. Last year, I bought some at Continental Noodles on Valentine's Day (feeling very lucky they still had stock). I searched early this year to compare and found some at Pusateri's, Summerhill Market and Pascale's Gourmet. 

I normally try to find special wine, whether it's a quality one that we love or finding a heart on a label or the word love that makes me purchase it for the label appreciation.

Most of these are not available now, but sometimes it's the search and then the find that is exciting; rather than just buying one I've had before. Sometimes, I see one in the summer or fall that I save for Valentine's Day. I haven't found my Valentine wine for this year yet. I'm looking forward to the search and if I don't find one, we have some special wines with meaningful stories we've been saving for a special occasion.

Music & Entertainment

Music is a big part of my life. On Valentine's Day, I enjoy listening to a smart playlist I created in iTunes/Apple Music of songs that contain the word love or heart (it's a fast and easy although imperfect playlist that also includes breakup or irrelevant songs). 

• Send my love (to your new lover) by Adele
• Horseshoe in my glove by Embrace
• Every Day I Love You Less and Less by Kaiser Chiefs
• Pride (In the Name of Love) by U2

My playlist is almost 24 hours long so I can't listen to it all, but I put it on shuffle and see what comes up. I also have a favourite love songs playlist that is more curated than a smart playlist. It takes more time to create it, but it's a work in progress. I add to it when I hear a song I feel belongs in it.

Sometimes we enjoy watching a Valentine-themed movie like Valentine's Day, An Affair To Remember, Sleepless in Seattle or shows like A Charlie Brown Valentine. Back in the day, our favourite shows would have holiday themes. Now that seasons are on streaming services, my daughter would find these episodes to watch on Thanksgiving or Christmas. This Valentine's Day, I'll watch one of these episodes:

• Friends “The One With the Candy Hearts” (Season 1, Episode 14)
• Grey's Anatomy "All You Need Is Love" (2012)
• Downton Abbey (Season 4, Episode 1)

Check out this Wikipedia page that lists all kinds of Valentine's Day television specials to find your favourite family, drama, horror, reality or sitcom episode.

Most importantly, on Valentine's Day, I love looking back at our photos and videos; reading old Valentine's cards; baking and cooking special treats and enjoying making new memories while enjoying the older ones.

Christmas Memories

Part 6 of my 60T🖤60 Project began on November 19th and ended on December 23rd. (For more information about my 60T🖤60 project, go to my other blog My Life Is Like A Song) Seeing that end date, and knowing that sometimes, I sprint to a deadline to complete a mini-project; making Part 6 have a Christmas theme seemed the smartest thing to do. I didn't want to be focusing on a different theme the week before Christmas.

When our kids were young, I often felt rushed when Christmas came around. I procrastinate naturally, but with a family birthday in mid December, I would wait to get a tree or decorate until after we had celebrated the birthday. I had read or heard from parenting experts to ensure that a child gets to celebrate their birthday separately from the Christmas celebrations, and I accepted this advice by not letting our house become too Christmassy until after the birthday. 

I have to admit that in mid-November this year, I was not feeling cheerful or excited about Christmas coming. I was already feeling stressed, overwhelmed and not in a celebratory mood. 

Focusing my project on Christmas would force me to look at the positives and help to make Christmas more festive. Coincidentally, on the day that my project started, I attended a "Spill The Tea" event by Tea With Tracie where Brenda Jasmin was speaking about infusing more joy and less stress during the holidays. One of the activities was for us to determine what made us happy; our "Ho Ho Ho list" and what drained us or things we wanted to let go of; our "Ho Ho Heck No" list. It was perfect timing to start Part 6 of my 60T🖤60 Project. I wanted to focus on what I loved the most and let go of what I didn't.

Photos

My first activity was to gather past Christmas memories and create a Christmas-themed photobook. Looking back at happy times lifted my mood. I didn't complete it in time to order for Blurb's Black Friday sale so I decided to show it digitally to my family at Christmas before completing it, in case they had extra photos or memories they wanted to share to improve it. (That was the plan but it dien't work out the way I hoped).

Looking back at all our Christmas cards gave me the idea to display them on our "living frame". A few years ago, my husband took an old frame, removed the broken glass, and added wire with clips to hold photos. We rotate photos depending on seasons or celebrations. Normally at Christmas, we add photos taken at Christmas time, but I liked focusing on our Christmas cards or photos we sent with Christmas cards when I didn't order actual photo cards.

Last year I ordered snowball garlands. I thought the balls would be bigger than they ended up being when I received them. I was happy that one of them fit perfectly around our living frame to make it more festive.

Christmas Card

I wasn't sure whether to send Christmas cards this year, especially as more and more people are choosing to end the tradition. We didn't have a recent family photo; and we lost our dog this year. 

Working on my Christmas photobook and seeing our past Christmas cards, gave me the idea to have Christmas memories as a theme for the card. We had festive family photos over the years that we had never shared because they were taken at Christmas or New Year's; when our Christmas cards would have already been sent. I included a photo with our dog; a photo with the kids' partners. I included the new card in the living frame (top middle).  I wanted to let people know the news about our dog, so added the sad news in a fun rhyme.

Getting together and telling stories
Looking back at Christmas memories
Excited as we anticipate making more
Before we reach 2024

(couple of more private lines)
This year was sad saying goodbye to our pup
The house is sadly quieter but needs less cleanup

Festive decorating is coming along
We’ll enjoy our favourite Christmas movie or song
A dusting of snow sets the mood
Menus will mix classics with new found food

May your Christmas be spent with friends and family
On New Year’s Eve, pop the Bublé or bubbly
While making a wish upon a star
“Joy for our loved ones near and far”

Music

I love Christmas music and especially love new Christmas songs over traditional ones. I used to have CDs of our favourite Christmas songs, but with technology changes, when we switched from iTunes to Apple Music, I lost those playlists. This project encouraged me to search and add old and new Christmas songs in a playlist (almost 500 songs!) in order to create a top 20 favourite songs playlist.

I really enjoyed listening to my favourite songs during the holiday season. My in-laws arrived at Christmas with a CD we made for them in the late 1990's or early 2000's.

I found it interesting how different this list was to my current one.

Every year, I love playing Christmas songs on the piano. This year was extra fun trying to learn songs on the ukulele. I initially thought I'd learn the Hawaiian Song Mele Kalikimaka; but it ended up being too difficult for me, so I found a couple of easier ones to learn.

Last year I tried to compose a Christmas melody. I wondered what made a melody sound Christmassy if it didn't have Christmas lyrics. I found some chord progressions that are popular in Christmas songs but didn't compose anything I liked. I enjoyed trying again this year, but still no success. One of these years, I'll compose a Christmas melody I will love. I'm adding that to my wishlist like I did in 1996 when I added "to write a song I like" on my list of dreams.

Movies

Last year, our daughter wrote a list of movies and shows to watch and put it on the fridge. I stored it with the Christmas decorations to continue the tradition. With a little research, I created a new list that we kept on the fridge this eyar. This helped in the decision-making process. We didn't need to keep searching streaming apps to figure out what to watch since I already did that to compile the list. When we watched one, we'd colour the bullet. I stored the list with the decorations again this year to be reminded to continue to complete watching it; or to re-print an updated list.

Gifts

Shopping for me is often stressful because I don't like buying something for the sake of buying something, but this year, I found meaningful gifts and had lots of help from my daughter that made me happy with the gifts I was giving.

Sometimes I also feel that if we are feeling happier, we are open to seeing clues for what we are looking for. In contrast, if we are feeling negative, clues pass us by without us noticing. I like to think that my improved mentality helped for me to find great ideas for gifts.

For many years, our kids decorated a gingerbread house during the holidays. 

I serendipitously found a gingerbread house that included the CN Tower, Rogers Centre, and downtown Toronto. I thought it would be a fun Christmas time activity for us to build it.

Food

While making the photobook, seeing photos of treats and foods we love at Christmas time helped me plan better and get the ingredients I needed early. I made favourites like tourtière (French Canadian meatpie) and sweetheart cookies (jam thumbprint cookies sometimes with marshmallows). 

Instead of my traditional shortbread recipe, I tried a new sugar cookie recipe cut in hearts and snowflakes  that turned out great (forgot to take a photo). A newer tradition is to make scones with cream. This year, our daughter found a bakery that sold homemade scones and traditional British clotted cream with homemade butter.

My French-Canadian heritage, mixed with my husband's British heritage, adds up to delicious treats.

When I first spent Christmas with my husband's family, they introduced me to a British tradition called Christmas crackers. Two people hold a cracker until it pops to reveal a paper crown/hat, a toy and a joke. When I popped mine, I felt a little disappointed at first by the yellow crown (instead of my favorite purple), but I was thrilled to find a heart keychain, just like the one I got last year. What a coincidence! (I love hearts in case you haven't been a regular reader of my blog)

Looking back at photos reminded me how much I love seeing Christmas lights around the city. I had hoped to visit the Eaton Centre, Nathan Phillips Square, the Distillery District or Inglewood "Kringlewood" Drive lined with giant inflatable Santas; like we had in the past or the new Illumi light festival in Mississauga, but I ended up not in the mood with the rainy weather. 

Even if I focused on Christmas Memories to help make Christmas more festive and meaningful, plans don't always go as we hope. With COVID visiting our family, and us not being all together, the gingerbread pieces and royal icing ended up in the freezer. My Christmas-themed photobook was saved for next year.

It's a good reminder that life is filled with ups and downs. Everything isn't always perfect, but we can make the best of what is presented to us.

This reminds me of a great quote: "Things turn out best for those who make the best of the way things turn out." 

Sorting Greeting Cards

I opened a childhood box to start the decluttering and organizing process. I didn't really have a plan but there were a couple of piles of greeting cards inside the box so I decided to focus on this today.

Someone told me once about her friend who discards greeting cards as soon as she receives them. We were both shocked. I was surprised because at that time I kept 90% of the cards I received. Her friend felt that the purpose of a greeting card was to convey good wishes. She felt that she received the wishes and the card no longer had a purpose. She didn't even put them on a mantle for a few days and discard them later. She opened the envelope, admired the card, read the wish and recycled it.

This blew my mind but it got me thinking. Why did I keep all my cards? As the piles increased the older I got and as my family expanded, how many cards should I keep? Every year we receive twenty to thirty Christmas cards. Multiply this by 20 years and that can add up to over 500 cards. We are four in our family. We receive cards for our birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine's Day, Mother's and Father's Day, Graduations, etc. The number of cards entering our house on a yearly basis was too much to keep them all. With the quantity increasing, it becomes more difficult to see and enjoy the most meaningful ones.

 It's hard to see what is special,
when you keep everything

A few years ago, I didn't go as far as the friend who discards them all but I did start to recycle cards that didn't have a meaningful message or picture. I enjoyed the cards for a few weeks but I didn't keep them all after that.

About a decade ago, I started to recognize that all the cards were mixed together and as the years went on,  I didn't know what year they were from. I started yearly folders so that cards, tickets and programs would be organized chronologically.

With cards in various places around the house, I began today by sorting through the ones in my childhood box from my bedroom. I separated them into categories:

• to and from my husband
• to and from our children
• our wedding
• travel
• correspondence (cards and letters with personal messages)
• new baby
• various occasions (wedding invitations, congratulations, favourite cards, cards from family and friends, etc.)

I had another box in my study that was full of cards so I then added them to the organized piles.

Once they were all separated, I stored them into a folder and small boxes that I gathered inside a larger box. All these cards are now in one place.

This initial effort did not involve decluttering. It looks like I had already decluttered these card piles.

I was surprised that there were only a few Christmas cards. I think I stored my Christmas cards inside my Christmas decorations boxes to look through them at Christmas time.

Although my Revive55 Memories Project just started, I am seeing the progress I had already made in the last few years of decluttering and organizing. There is a lot more to do and I am excited to delve deeper into preserving these memories.

I think one of my 10 mini projects will involve greeting cards and correspondence. Although I didn't declutter any today, I'm sure that once all the cards are together and I focus more on them, it will be easier to only keep the special ones. When I have a plan for what I want to do with the most meaningful ones and save the messages, keeping all these actual cards will no longer be necessary.

I'm happy that the jumbled mess of cards are separated and organized. As I continue the decluttering and organizing of other boxes and folders, I will separate the cards and organize them with these so that in the end they will all be in the one place.

I can then decide what I will want to do with them.